Friday, March 29, 2013

Makin' Groceries

Confession time: I... am a bag hag. I am not talking about designer purses either. Reusable shopping bags - cheap, available everywhere, and oh so easy to accumulate.
I haven't counted my bag collection lately, but I do know I literally have more bags than I can use in a single grocery trip. We once took every bag I could lay my hands on when we did the shopping. We  filled TWO full size grocery carts, used my bags for everything we purchased, and I still had at least a dozen bags left over.
If I am out shopping and I see a sign that says "buy product X and get a FREE shopping bag!!" I will buy product X. Whether I need it or not. Seriously, I have a problem.
My issue with using my bags is that no one seems to know how to load the damned things. "Oh, let me take the biggest bag you have and load it so that the Incredible Hulk couldn't even lift it." Without fail. Every. Time.
On today's trip, a single bag was loaded with two cans of beans, ALL of my produce, and the seven pound ham I bought for Easter Sunday. WTF dude, really? If my avocado gets squished, I am coming for your ass.
I know that grocery retailers train their checkers and baggers on the proper loading of the standard plastic bags. "No more than X canned goods. Ice cream and frozen items go in these. Double bag raw meat products." Would it really be so difficult to stick up a note at the register regarding cloth bags?
"REMEMBER: If you can't lift it, your customer probably can't either." DUH.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Don't call it a comeback

After 4 weeks with bronchitis, I am finally back in the land of the living.
Now that I can breathe again I am attempting to get back on my weekly cleaning/productivity schedule. Hopefully that will include lots of fun and interesting things to blog about, right now the only thing I have been doing is coughing up lung monsters and no one wants to read about THAT.

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Hummingbird Cake

Since I am beginning to feel human again, I decided today would be a good day for my next installment of Cooking the Books. I decided that this time I was going to make a Southern classic - Hummingbird cake.
This cake was mentioned in The Caster Chronicles, and The Girl Who Chased the Moon by Sarah Addison Allen. Allen is, like me, from North Carolina and sets all of her books here. They are fun, quick reads, and all figure food prominently. She has all of the recipes from her books available on her website. I had planned to use her cake recipe, but since I am still feeling puny, I went with the Cake Mix Doctor's recipe instead.
Most of the recipes I looked at called for pecans, this one did not, so I added them to the cream cheese frosting. It made it a little hard to get on the cake, but the texture is great, so I don't care that it got a little ugly.
Overall, it is a good cake, and I might make it again, next time I have a potluck to go to.

Monday, March 4, 2013

I'm only 39 dammit!!!

I nearly forgot about this, but I dragged myself out of bed to share it.
Last month I saw an orthopedist about my tennis elbow. I was basically told "It's wear and tear. You're almost 40, it comes with age."
Then, last week, I had an eye exam and was told "You're going to need bifocals within 5 years. It's probably going to be closer to three."
As if that wasn't bad enough, today at the doctor's office, the nurse who took my vitals asked "Period?" and I said "I just had it last week." She then replied "Oh, so you still have it then?"
I am THIRTY NINE. I have not been through the fucking change!!!
The next person who calls me old is going to get punched in the throat.

I haz teh plague

So it seems I have gotten behind on my blogging. Every member of our family of four is sick right now. Started out as head colds, but things have progressed. The girls and I went to the doctor today, turns out the 3 year old has a double ear infection, and the 9 year old and I have "acute bronchitis".
Honestly, with the mouth-breathing, snot filled, feverish wreck that I am right now, there is nothing *cute* about it.

Husband is on his way home with antibiotics for the kids, and 4 scrips for me. Hopefully, in a few days, I will be back to my clever self.