I nearly forgot about this, but I dragged myself out of bed to share it.
Last month I saw an orthopedist about my tennis elbow. I was basically told "It's wear and tear. You're almost 40, it comes with age."
Then, last week, I had an eye exam and was told "You're going to need bifocals within 5 years. It's probably going to be closer to three."
As if that wasn't bad enough, today at the doctor's office, the nurse who took my vitals asked "Period?" and I said "I just had it last week." She then replied "Oh, so you still have it then?"
I am THIRTY NINE. I have not been through the fucking change!!!
The next person who calls me old is going to get punched in the throat.